Cheezland

By the cheezpeeps, for the cheezpeeps!

Lolspeek

Stole this from myself, originally posted in 2008 – I thought it might be of some use for or interest to those who are relatively new to lolspeak. :-) 
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I made a quick reply to a troll, on ICHC (link killifyed by you-know-who), which seems to have met with approval. I thought I’d expand on it a bit with my own perspective.

People drop by periodically and ask us why we’re using lolspeak, which they see as odd, stupid, maybe a sign of illiteracy.

The simplest answer, of course, is that it’s fun. It lets people talk about their cats in a playful kind of tone no matter what the cat in question has done. It keeps the mood light and a bit silly. It mimics the way many of us speak to our cats, as if they were small children or babies. Is this all childish? Maybe. But many of the “higher order” animal species display play behaviour even as adults, especially in artificially restricted environments. If you think ours isn’t, then tell me: when did you last try to escape a leopard, or have to hunt your next meal yourself or go hungry? (My apologies to that minority who can answer this question in the affirmative.)

Play, or doing something purely for the enjoyment of it, has a long list of benefits. It’s a stress reliever, reducing tension and lowering blood pressure, and therefore has a positive impact on physical health. It reduces anxiety and promotes enjoyment of life and creativity, and therefore has a positive impact on mental and emotional health. It improves energy and keeps the mind active, and therefore has a positive impact on one’s activities. Plus, it can build social bonds, helping to create a sense of community, and I’m not going to go into how many people in modern society feel isolated and alone, that’s another subject altogether.

Lolspeak is, I think, a more creative means of play than people who haven’t taken a close look at it really comprehend. In order to write in lolspeak and make oneself understood, and in order to read what others are writing, one needs a good grasp of English to begin with. Since much of lolspeak is phonetic, having posters from all over the world only complicates this. One also needs mental flexibility. We’re all conditioned to certain word patterns and spellings, and going counter to that actually takes some real effort of concentration. It forces one to actually think about the word, how it sounds, what one is trying to convey.

I write. I know from writing, and reading, that cliches are, for the most part, lazy and ineffective. Why? Because they’re so routine that no one bothers to call up the image that’s specified. Or worse, because the reader has little or no idea what the actual meaning or source of it is (crocodile tears, swan song, to be led by the nose). If you see “at a snail’s pace,” or “strong as an ox,” or “put the cart before the horse,” to use a string of animal cliches, I would say that most people will not actually visualize a snail creeping along, the physical power of an ox, or the absurd image of a cart being in front of the horse. They’ll simply accept it as meaning “slow,” “very strong,” and “backwards,” and leave it at that. The imagery is so overused that there’s no need to think about it, and humans being the lazy creatures we are, if we don’t have to, we won’t.

I brought up cliches because individual words can have the same thing happen. I’m going to use one of my favourite lolspeak expressions as an example. Cats have claws. Yes, of course they do, unless they’ve been declawed, and let’s not go there currently. Does this create any particular mental image, or does it just register as a simple fact? Now, in lolspeak: Kittehs having teh pointy endz. Claws. Pointy endz. Which one gives you a more vivid image? Pointy endz will eventually become cliche itself, but by then, lolspeak will have continued to change, I suspect, and a new term will have evolved.

Personally, I find it neat how one can use a word to imply another. Mai kittehs freaten me wif teh pointy ends if ai iz late wif teh gushifud. ‘Freaten’ is ‘threaten’, but also implies ‘frighten’, and although I share a very loving and trusting relationship with my cats, I do have a healthy respect for their natural weaponry. ‘Pointy ends’ is a more evocative term for said weaponry. ‘Gushifud’ creates a much clearer impression of wet canned cat food, without needing to go at length into texture and odour. In comparison, My cats will threaten me with their claws if I’m late with their wet food sounds forced, and the more likely, My cats will be mad if I’m late with their supper is positively bland and actually conveys less info.

I’m not an expert on lolspeak. This is just my perspective, my observations, and I’m more than happy to hear those of others. To me, however, it’s the very opposite of “talking like a moron”. It actually requires more concentration and mental elasticity both to do.

Ultimately, though, I’m guessing the main reason why any of us do it is because it’s so much fun!

95 Comments

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  1. Yew dun gud job esplanen lolspeak! Mi mien seez da kittehs n goggies aksulie saeing deezs woerds. kthxbye.

  2. This is a great explanation for those who don’t understand what we’re all saying! I can practically read plain English language without really thinking, but lolspeak makes my brain work a little harder, which is good mental exercise!

    Also, so many people don’t realize that many of the lolspeakers that they’re calling morons are actually highly educated people who know multiple languages and have degrees in language or work in a field that either teaches language skills or a field in which language skills are extremely important.

  3. It also gibs moar flexibilolty for punnificayshunz adn dubblol-antanderering. Derz awlso an infinit amownt ob wordificayshuns avaylablol, limited onleh bai ur creatibitivenessez.

  4. LOL!! I know what the lolspeak words mean like ‘pointy endz’ but one paragraph in lolspeak can take me up to 10 minutes to read. Do you speak Klingon too? :)

    1. iz juss practiss aifinkso! Sum peeps finkso sayin it owt loud helps :) Until yu meetz sumwun wiv a bery strawng aksent!

    2. Practiss maeks purrrrfekt, short1fry.
      An if yew still donut fined it easypeasy, then post in plain English.

      1. dats rite AnemoneOne *nods*
        lolspeak am ops…oshin…yu du nawt haz tu yooz

    3. When ai nawt sekund (we neber neber uses da werd first [or first]), it used tu take me at least dat long to read adn unnerstand it. Nao, it’z almost like a sekund lanjuaje. Ai sumtimes catch left putting lolspeek inna emayo to relatibes, or saying a lol werd inna fone conbersashun. Eberywun haz dere own way ob “phrasing” or spelling werds, so hop on board adn praktise, praktise, praktise. :)

    4. {{{{Shorty}}} It might helpify you to speak in hoominspeek for awhile while you get used to LOLspeek by just reading it. When learning a gnu language, INPUT is more important than OUTPUT at the beginning. Read the LOLspeek, and gradually add moar wurds til yu am righting it awl teh thyme an den youz floo-int. Taek yur thyme reedin, teh posts nawt goes nowhere. {{{{{moar hugs for Shorty}}}}

    5. I really enjoyed everyone’s comments :) :)

      Thankfully my boss isn’t in yet. It took me a really long time to read and I had to sound it out.

      I am bilingual though, I speak feline. ;)

      1. Ohai Short1fry (ai LUBS dat naym!)! Ai remember when ai started to read the LOLs and the comments way back in 2008 or so that I ackshully got a headache! But being the stubborn and hard-headed German that ai am, ai persevered, and hey presto! It’s become another lankwitch for me! Pardon mai JUrman accent in teh lolspeak, pweeze. Ai hope u enjoy this site as much as effurywun else. U is welkum to use standard English, of course.

        1. Hi Upfi

          “German accent” in lolspeak – *snerk* :)

      2. Teh funnee fing wills be teh nawt-sekkund tiem yoo starts to typify an email at workworkwork adn realize yoo has used a word liek “borked” or “peoplol” —
        *gigglols at teh memories*

        1. LOL! Eye tol ah frend fhew dais bak dat eye dedn’t du “Facebork”,
          an dey gotz ah funnee luuk ohn der faze, lyke eye waz loozen mai marbuls!

          1. U? Loozen ur marbles? Noooo – dey are right ober there – no, under the fridge! Or wherebber teh kittehs batbatbatted them. *nods wif a certainness*

            Dere be a cheezfrend (Siobhan?) wif teh motto: “Ai haven’t lost mai mind. Ai noes eggsacktly where ai left it.”

  5. Lolspeek iz a boon fur peepl hoo kqn’t spell oar han slite diselkseeuh!

    1. is habit formin, tho. I had to take some notes recently and reading them back was funny as I had done part of them in LoLspeak. They made purrfect sense, though!

      1. Yurp! Ai sed teh wurd “huzbing” inna wurk chat tudai. Yu kud tell hoo wuz innertoob nerdz, dey wuz teh wunz hoo noed wut ai sed.

  6. Dis a berri gudgudgud articlol! Wen Ai nawt sekund red cawmints a lawng tyme ago, Ai fawt “dese peeps hav waay tuu much tyme awn dere handz!” Butt(!) az Ai red moar an kaym bac agen adn agen, Ai saw teh fun innit an saw teh cummyoonitee. Wunce Ai startid postifyin, lolspeek kaym pritee kwiklee!

  7. *sigh*
    I clickified teh link ennewaze.
    Readed ebbery last kommint. Sebberal ob dem were from Maus. *sniff*

    1. I did, too. Maus, an Ambercat *snif they would love our new olace. Some other peeps M.I.A. are EECK thecat, Judson, oh, I cant remember…does anyone know how to reach these peeps?? Oh, leezaB, too.

      1. Klikkd teh link, got beta hoampayj. Aifink dats eben saddur. *sniff*

      2. I keep going to the ‘old’ site and looking for people and saying hi.

      3. Ai jes sent uh messij tew RHSB.

  8. Sumtiemz I tryz tu splane tu mai noomruss chilluns an remawkabul huzbin bowt lolspee an hao clebber it offin iz an hao i can tell taht allot uv mai frinz are teh berry smart butt(!) aidoanfinkso I doo a berry gud job. Nao, I will juss direck dems tu dis paige ware awl iz essplaned purrfeckly!

  9. Ai habs a fyoo cheezfrenz dat sending me emayos inna lolspeek. Mai huzbing goze, “Here’s another email for you in that cheezie language”. Him did tri tu reedid it an gaved up, sew ai reedid it tu him. Baffloled teh carp outta him. *snerk*

    1. Wazzat Carp beeg enuf furr dinnerz?

  10. I have a problem with the englsih language and with my own language but I still love reading if I can the lolspeek. I is not good at it but will contuine to try.

    1. Ohai, Torchy! *extens floofy paw of frenship* Welcum!Yu dont has to speek lolspeek if it maeks you wurried abowt misteaks or sumfin. Reglar hyoomin tawk is perfekly OKAY. In fac, enny polite langwuije dat yu know is perfekly okaey. Onliest fingie, is if you want to haff akshual convursashuns, it shud probly be a langwije dat SOME peeps speek, as I don’t fink we has too many Eckstraterrestials joinin in, unless tehy know Inglish pritty gud.

      1. I’z awso not so gewd. It’s easy for me to read but so difficult for me to write! It’s great that people don’t judge ya by your lolzspeek skillz hehe. I lub da feel of dis camoonity

  11. Ai lerk-lerk-lerked at DOP-ey place fore a lawng thyme an nebber ebber said nuffings. Ai lurned tew reed LolSpeak obber dere. Neow at dis gnu and wunnermaus playce, ai am goings tew come awt ob deh shadoez an trie tew be speechifying sumtimez, tew. Ai lubs awl ob yew peeps an have fore a berry, berry lawng thyme, sew ai decyded tew stikk mai head owt an say sumpin. Yew awl haz an awesum an ai lubs yew!! :D

    1
    1. da bestest ting aboot LOLspeek iz dat knowun kin tell yoo dat you bee dooin rong!! Iz awl rite and tite and correctamunga!

    2. OHai and welkum! IT’s great that u have unlurkified!!!! Ai lubs u, too!

    3. Yu am berreh welcom caroleleah! Ai stil lurkify sumthymes, eben dough ai du joy nin nao an den. Dere a reely frenly bunch heer!

    4. YaY fur unlerkifing!!! *eggstez floofeh paw ob Frech Hips tu caroleleah*

    5. Aww… Fankees foar teh wekkum, ElsaMama, Upfi, Gunnersmama, an MuchCat!! Sea? Ai TOLE yew dat yew wuz awl naise! :-)
      Ai am habbings teh confoosed trying tew keep up wiff awl teh kommints awn teh diffrint payges rite now, sew ai habs bin layte on ansserring a lawt, oar prolly missing sum kompleetly! Dere habs bin a LAWT ob tawk-tawk-tawk awn hear tonite, and ai nawt shure how tew best follo awl teh tawk yet. Aifinkso maybee dere be moar-moar-moar tawk tonite becaws ebbrybodie ekksited tew habs a gnu hoam agin, an just jabber-jabber-jabber lyke wii do at a famblee reyoonyun? :lol:
      Going tew bed neow, Cheezfrenz. Ai habs bin hear awl dae an cuud nawt mayke mii leeve! ;) It habs bin an eggsiting dae, butt(!) it lukks lyke tyme to say g’nite, finally. Sea awl obs yew loverly peeps agin berry soon!

    6. welcome, caroleleah.

  12. I finks wee needz a alfabetizolation list of LOLspeek werds!! I startz ..

    A — Aminolz
    B — Behinny
    C — Cwazy Katz Ladee

    D…?

    1. D – DOP – Dat Otter Place
      E – Elefunks
      F – Frenz, ob teh Cheeze purrr sway shun
      G…

      1. Gushifud, goggie
        Heffalump, harblz
        Iyez, isee-kreemz!
        J…

      2. jugular, pointy ends held at… also, jagwar, cousin of kitteh…
        ,k?
        LOL
        M…

        1. Menne moar munkeez
          Nennepus! Nawt-sekund.
          Ohai! Orly?
          P…

          1. Pi Stall
            QED
            Redneck Scientist
            S…

            1. Srsly
              Teh
              Ufny
              V…

              1. Voovoozelaz fur BF tu tuut
                Wunnermus
                Xtra kittehs
                YNG’s
                Zappa (Frank) Juss coz ai lubs hymn!

              2. Wii donut singing Zappa hymns in mai chruch!! *watchin wer da huskeez go…*

              3. ooooh Ai lubs me sum Zappa…Ai misses hims kwit wit and teh way wif teh tyme signashurrs in teh mewsik, tew…

                Ai’d goe tu teh pamkayk breffist at Saintly Alphonso’s!

      3. Do not be forgettin F also bein for Floofy paw of Frenship, alwaes!

  13. Thx, very insightful post! *Silvertoes tappatz mi on sholder–MOOOMM dat shud reed “Tx vry insytfull poast!”*

    1. Hiya – I have been a lurker for a v.long time and have moved over to this new site as well-which is warm and friendly and i recognised names that although i dont know the peeps i know the names which is somehow a comfort. I cant speak lolspeak (yet) and it is hard to read sometimes but I enjoy a challenge! This site is purfect – thanks to everyone. Maybe I will stop lurking and start posting.

      1. O hai, tulipcat nd welkom tu this happie plays !! Tehre am a noo LOL dew in 15 minnets sew kum joyn us, woant yoo ?? Clikk on teh big CHEEZLAND wurd awn top of teh page nd yoo will see teh LOLs unnerneef, teh newist wun awn top :D

      2. Ohai tulipcat! Yess! Pls tu plae wiff us! *eggstens floofy paw ob frend ships*

        1. thanks you kindly PB and muchcat – accepts floofy paw *oooo so soft*

          1. Ohai tulipcat! I hope you will come out and play with us! Don’t worry about lolspeek, or a lack of lolspeek, not everyone uses it and thats just fine, the choice is yours! Welcome!

      3. Ohai, Tulipcat! Wekkum tew dis luverly plais! Yew will bee postifying lyke the wind berry soon, wevver in LolSpeek oar English. Ai wuz gnu hear wunce, tew, sew ai unnerstans. Lessee, ai wuz gnu waay, waay bakk in… *kountz awn fingers*… dat’s rite – itt wuz waay bakk awn yesturrday!! *gigglols* Yew will lubbs it hear, an will comfie berry berry fast!!! :-)

      4. Ohai tulipcat! Wellkum tu dis lubberly plays. Donut wurree ’bout lolspeek – iz up tu yu wetha yu uzez it or nut. Ai iz gnu heer tu. Ai uze tu lurkify at teh otter plays az well. Teh mayn fing iz tu jus hab sum fun. *Eggstenz floofy paw ob french ship*.

      5. ohai tulipcat! Ai haz just mooved heer from DOP butt(!) wuz nawt there foar a lawng thyme… tew mush chayngiz. nao DOP borkeborkedborked an sew– wii haz fun here! May come a time when you write lolspeek so natyurally that when you go to write an email you will have trouble talking straight! It happened to mee-ee! :lol:

      6. Ohai Tulipcat! Ai tu waz a lurkr fa loong teim. Ai hadz a espeshul hedstrat wif lolspeak tho. Ai haz a kinda dyslexia an Ai purtty mush spllez lik dis aniwayz. Ai lurfes dis plais! Ai hadz a sooo sadz wif DOP, dis plais savified mi heawt. And yes, much to the consternation of my friends and family, I cannot stop talking and writing in Lolspeak. It is very habit forming!

      7. Ohai Tulipcat! *eckxstens floofy paw of frenship* Weklome to teh plase of happie cheezfrenz! Dere is NO RULE dat sez yu has to speek in lolspeek, an lolspeek has no rules, esckept dat one I jus menshuned.
        Which is a little confoozling mebbeh but it basically meens dat as long as you play nise NOBUDDY will maek fun or teeze abowt misteaks or bein shie or stuff. Noobies are jus as welcom to play as us ole-tiemers!!!! Even wid teh shinee fings!

  14. Was the concept of “pointy ends” specifically a Calvin & Hobbes reference?

    http://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1987/11/21

    1. Eggsalad point! *snerk* (adn ai lub mii sum Calvin & Hobbes!) :-D

  15. To me, teh bestest fingie abowt lolspeek is dat it hints at teh anarkee (oh, all right, anarchy) dat we suspeck is presint in teh mind ob owr kittehs. To teh kitteh, teh fonetic or quikest way tu get somfing wun wants is teh bestest wae. So nebber miend all dat rool stuff. Say whut yu want NOW an dont fink tu musch abowt it. NOW NOW NOW an hu caers abowt “misteaks”.
    *lolspeek off*
    Time and time again, I’ve discovered that the goofiest users of lolspeek are the ones with the deepest love of language and the most skills in playing with words. The thing that keeps me coming back is that lolspeek is always tongue-in-cheek. It’s NOT baby-talk, and usually not cutesy-wootsy talk either – it’s usually an attempt, by a human with carefully-learned limitations, to imagine what our cats would say if they could type without our limitations. Or inhibitions.
    *lolspeek on*
    Of korse, us peeps suspeck dat beside bein anarkists, our kittehs are smarter dan us aneeways – aftur all, hu reely runs our howseholeds?? AmIrite?? Uv cowrse.

    1. Anom. An den sum. [bow]

  16. Hai cheezpeeps.
    I’z new to lolzspeek and diz websight so i’z a turn its awff

    What I really like about reading lolzspeek is that it makes me feel good inside. I always imagined what my kitteh would say if he could speek and I fink this is right on point. I also think that it is something that brings catlovers of all kinds and all places of the world together. There is a huge online community here where everyone is nice, unlike many other web forums.

    I wanted to ask the rest of you guys what you think about this aspect of lolzspeek as a sense of community between each other. It’s not something that just anyone can understand or get into, but those of us who do sure have fun with it :)

    I’z like ta heere what yu guyz fink.

    1. Ohai, KhanKitty! *wayvs* (lolspeek off) I come here to relax, have a laugh, and give my brain cells a workout. I love the pun runs adn teh junrull sillehniss (oops, lolspeek habs a wai ob comink bak on its oan) adn the senss ob comyou nitty. Adn, yesh, it am berry important to me dat teh peeps heer ar fun wiffowt bean meen.

    2. Yeff, aifink it halps bring us tugebber kuz its sumfin we shayrz in kommun, adn mayks us diffrint den obber reglar foaks. Adn ai lykes hao it mayks u fink in kreaytib wayz. Adn hao it allowz ebrywun tu ekspressing der oan yooneek idennityz.

  17. Do all of you think that (lol) is a word as my husband does? If it is a word than is (FBI) and (CIA) etc. words also?

    1. Yesh, dey is awlso werds, butt(!) harder to pro pronon prononnynon say.

    2. 8O Dats mama! Nao sheez postifyin heer? Papaz bad enuff!

      1. :lol: Sheez keepin hur ais awn yu.
        Ohai, AP. So . . . hao duz yu say FBI? oar CIA?

        1. Well, ai tolded hur tu chekk owt Sofiaz ninja FP…

          Ai sez dem F-B-I adn C-I-A. Saym wiff B-M-W adn I-S-S.

          But LOL adn eben ROFL ai sez lyke wurds, speshully kuz we has mayded obber wurds owtta demz, lyke lolcats adn lolspeek.

          1. *tayks noats*
            Will ai be kwizzifyed laytur?
            BTW, Sofiaz FP pichur am full ob ossim adn mistree.
            Pee Ess: ISS = Inturnashunall Play Spayss Stayshun?

            1. *ding-ding-ding* we has a weener! :)

  18. To All : marqos surgery went well and although uncomfortable seems to be in good spirits.Really sore but doing fine and surgery was 3.5 hrs including recovery time in.Asked that I post so all would know-Mr Casey

    1. Ohai, Mr. Casey!!! Thanks for the update! Please give her a hug from everyone at Cheezland. We hope she can come back and play soon.

    2. Yay!!! Fanks muchly for letting us know!!! We be thinking abowt her and sending lotsa lubs!!!

    3. Thank you for the update Mr Casey. I’m glad things went well. Who’s feeding the goats?

    4. Thank you so much for the update, Mr Casey! Please send her our love, thoughts, hugs & well wishes! [hug]

  19. marqos update,doing well,sore has been moved to Rehab care,could not come home,felt better at center ,more one on one and our babies might cause a fall.They all miss her and are always searching but doing OK. Mr Casey

    1. Thank you for the update, Mr Casey ! Please give a hug to MaryQoS and to the furbabies who are missing her – I hope she will be home with you all soon !

  20. Myne hoomin lady lykes to purrtend and do sum role playin, lyke it is meze doin da tawkin anz not her. Sheze glad dat dis site exists anz it is a brake frum her effuryday, ordinary life! She beze also a writer anz dis to her is fun anz relaxin! Let da lolspeak continue!

    1. ohai Moonshadow-did yu see yur kittehs inn teh gallery?

      1. Yez, Ize shure did! Thankz so muches fur puttin’ dem dere!

  21. Ok, effuryfur! Ize thinkz Ize gonna cawl it a nite anz sai gootnite to awl of youse. Thankz fur maykin meze welcome dis week anz fur being myne new furiends! Meow!

    1. sew happie tew have a noo cheezfren Moonshadow! nitey nite.

  22. Hey, ifn any of youse wuld like fur mom to wurk on old pikturs, pleeze let meze know…she duz purty good! Of korse, mom ain’t tellin herown mom about the grandparents copy of da wedding pic dat wur redone anz colored frum a black n white copy….da original mom’s mom haz anz mom’s cousin sended mom a copy of dat pictur in email attachment. Mom’s mom wuld be flippin’ anz mad ifn she fownd owt dat mom used Adobe Photoshop to make a colored version. MOL!

  23. Rebecca Surette

    OHAI! Ai wannered arown affer dat ol playc wented away, all alonsum anna stuffs, anna fownd teh peeps onna fayzebuk, anna dey sayd, HEY, Yew NEEDA GO DERE! Iz fun anna yew has happylaffs. So here ai am.

    Kthnxbai.

    1. OHAI

      happy tails an glad to meet u!

    2. Kthxbai? :? How bowt kthxHello?
      Ai hoeps u will joyning us in dis happeh playse!

    3. Ohai Rebecca! Happi to see yu heer!! *Waves merrilee in all directions*

    4. Ohai Rebecca! Kum plai wiv us! We du nawt byte!

  24. Rebecca Surette

    Meh ol compter iz dyin. anna cudnt get heer. Naow ai haz NEW compter! Happydance!

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